Thursday, February 25, 2010

How He loves us

We sang this song tonight at the "Celebrate Recovery" group that I went to. I hadn't heard it before and thought it was beautiful.
David Crowder How He loves us...
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TWgeUrD4MHI&feature=fvw

I went to that group tonight not knowing what to expect. It's for all kinds of issues. They have a half our of worship (which was amazing), a half hour of a speaker, and then an hour of breaking up in small groups and talking/sharing. Of the groups they have right now the one that applied to me most was "Codependency"...I have to say I'm resistant to accepting that as a struggle of mine. Every time I hear the word codependency all I can think is "Puke me a river". I hate that word, it brings back memories of my mom dealing with codependency when we were all going to counseling as a family when I was younger. Oh well, I'm trying to look beyond that because I do have a lot of those issues and I do have a lot of patterns that need to change.
It was good to be with others who are on this journey to recovery as well. It was uncomfortable, but yet good. It's hard to see things in other people that I see in myself and really don't like. It's good for me though, and it helps me to want to let Jesus change me and helps me see what things aren't right. I'm trying to surrender to Jesus and let Him guide me and show me what I need right now. He's faithful and I have been so blessed this week with His great love for me.

I've been good the last 3 days. Not high, not low, just good. I just have peace and I'm enjoying just resting in Jesus.
All the dizziness, headaches, eye pain, blurred vision, nausea... it's all soooo much better and mostly gone now that I have started taking the med. that was causing it at night instead of in the morning. I can't read/write/watch tv/drive/ride for long, but in short periods of 15min. at a time, I do great and then I can come back to it if I take a 15min. break and I'm ok. I can deal with that; I'm thanking Jesus that I'm feeling so much better!

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